Character
by xrosepetalx
Summary: A dozen drabbles inspired by a list of admirable qualities. JamesLily.
1. Tolerance

**Tolerance**

_n. the act or capacity of enduring._

He had tried to be tolerant with her. He had even attempted to understand why she rejected him for so long. But this was too much. It maimed his soul every time she met his looks of passion with scorn in her eyes. Every time she threw an insult his way, it pierced his heart like a dagger. When she sat with Snape under the beech tree and threw her head back and laughed, he broke. She had pushed him off the edge of the cliff, and he was falling: falling away from her. That was it. He couldn't take it anymore. He promised himself that he wouldn't be tolerant anymore.


	2. Honesty

**Honesty**

_n. truthfulness, sincerity, or frankness._

If she was honest with herself, she had to admit that she was attracted to him. His dark hair, tousled from Quidditch (_but what about when he messed it up himself?_). His eyes, that beautiful shade of hazel with those adorable green flecks (_shining with mischief as he hexed an innocent bystander_). Even his mouth, curving smoothly as he talked to her (_crashing around like a buffalo as he insulted Severus_). His laugh was especially endearing, hiccupy and child-like (_sneering and arrogant as he looked at her and Sev together_). No, she wouldn't let herself stray down that path. She couldn't betray Severus. She was at a fork in the road, and her choices were the bright, happy forest and the dark, dank woods. She lied to herself and chose the latter.


	3. Respect

**Respect**

_v. to hold in esteem or honour._

On the one hand, he had to respect her. She didn't let anything tear her beliefs apart, no matter how wrong they seemed to the rest of the world. He had tried to tell her that some outside factors mattered (_like association with Death Eaters_), but she didn't care. She didn't care what anyone thought, especially not him. In spite of this, he would still respect her. How could he not respect someone who was so strong in her beliefs? He would grow up and stop showing off, and maybe, just maybe, things would work themselves out. All she needed from him was respect.


	4. Courage

**Courage**

_n. the quality that enables a person to face difficulty without fear; bravery._

She had to be strong. Ever since her realization, he had started to wear her down. She had discovered some time ago that he actually was a good person underneath the arrogant façade; now, she was actually starting to appreciate it. Even after years of her being nasty to him, he seemed to still care for her. As much as she had tried to discourage his advances, he was still trying. He was a lion, strong in his courage, while she was a small and cowardly mouse, hiding from her feelings, afraid that they would swallow her up and eat her whole. She needed to build herself up. Ignorance had worked so far; why should it stop now? She would ignore him: she would be a lion, too.


	5. Duty

**Duty**

_n. something that one is expected to do by moral obligation._

He needed a distraction; his resolve to leave her alone was weakening. He forgot his promise whenever he allowed himself to look into her gorgeous green eyes. Those eyes were mocking him, saying that he would never be able to get over them. And every time he would look away, he felt ashamed of himself for not really trying. He needed something to help him forget. That something came into his head immediately. _The Marauders._ They hadn't pulled a prank in a while, and he had been ignoring them in favor of Lily…he owed it to them. He owed it to himself. He was a Marauder, and with that came certain duties to be carried out.


	6. Care

**Care**

_v. to be concerned; have thought or regard._

She used to care when they pulled pranks. But now she found that she, well…didn't. She was actually, dare she say, _enjoying them._ She found herself laughing along with the crowd as a bewitched pair of gloves followed Amycus Carrow around, poking him and dumping ink wells over his head. She laughed so hard she couldn't breathe when all the professors' hair turned purple and their skin turned turquoise. At first, she tried to be stern and disapproving and glare at them like she used to. However, laughter was contagious, and she had caught the disease. And every time she giggled at one of their ridiculous stunts, she would see him looking at her in that way. Now _that_ was something she cared about.


	7. Diligence

**Diligence**

_n. constant and earnest effort to accomplish what is undertaken._

He had seen her laughing at their pranks (_heck, even he laughed his arse off after that one with the forks and the firework)_, and she seemed to be warming up to him a bit. When he caught her eye and grinned at her after a trick well played, instead of glaring at him like she used to, she actually smiled back! He was so shocked the first few times that he confirmed with Moony to make sure he wasn't seeing things. Well, now that the Signs weren't just in his head, he could act on them and they might work this time. The only thing that wouldn't change would be his diligence, although he might try to be a little less creepy-stalkerish this time around.


	8. Integrity

**Integrity**

_n. the state of being whole, entire, or undiminished._

Something had changed. Somewhere along the way, they had become friends. They studied together (_him wheedling her for exhorbitant amounts of help, her giving in eventually_), they ate together (_his friends teasing them about being a couple, them carefully looking away and blushing_), they even went to Hogsmeade together (_throwing snowballs at each other, wrestling on the cold, wet ground_). It was hard to remember what it was like before this, before life without James seemed like such an odd (_frightening_) thought. In order to maintain her integrity, she needed him. She needed him to be whole. And while that was a scary (_wonderful_) thought, she thought that she might just be okay with it.


	9. Loyalty

**Loyalty**

_n. the state or quality of being faithful._

It seemed like a normal occurrence. He was just talking to her, some random girl from Ravenclaw, about their Transfiguration homework, when, all of a sudden, she pressed him into the wall and reached up for a kiss. He reached up to push her away (_no, no, no, not her, not her…_), when he heard a gasp. He looked up, and there _she_ was, standing at the end of the corridor with this horribly shocked look on her face. But, she _couldn't_ be thinking what he thought she was thinking, could she? After all this time of him being so loyal to her (_he hadn't even chased after anyone else since third year_)…but she clearly was. And by the time he finally managed to get out from under the Ravenclaw, she was already gone.


	10. Fair

**Fair**

_adj. free from dishonesty or injustice._

It was just so _unfair!_ Just when she finally accepted his place in her life (_she can't live without him_), he goes and does something so…so…so _stupid!_ She should have known, he had always been such a womanizer (_never looking at anyone else but to make her jealous_), playing with her affections like she was that _annoying_ little Snitch he always has in his back pocket (_protecting it, just like he used to do with you_)…she really should have seen this coming. He was always going to break her heart. But she was lonely and he had finally started to change and she didn't have anyone anymore (_not Severus, not Tuney, but maybe she never really had them anyway…_) and maybe he wasn't such a toerag after all…but he _was_. And it was so unfair.


	11. Trust

**Trust**

_v. __to rely upon or place confidence in someone or something._

Shit. Why did the world hate him so _much_? Sure, he had done horrible things in the past — actually _deserving_ her scorn — but he hadn't even done anything this time! And things were still messed up between them. He had tried to explain to her that nothing had happened, that he was practically _attacked_, for Merlin's sake, but she wouldn't listen. Never mind listening: she wouldn't even give him a chance to say anything now before walking away. And it was killing him. Moony had tried telling him that she was depressed too, but every time that he looked over at her (_which was still too often, especially considering their current state of not-even-friends_), she seemed so _happy_. It wasn't even that she was perfectly fine — blissful, even — without him that really got to him. No, it was that she really thought that he would do something like that. It was that she didn't trust him. And that broke him.


	12. Responsible

**Responsible**

_adj. having a capacity for moral decisions._

She was so angry with him, though Remus kept telling her that she shouldn't be. He told her that J-Potter hadn't wanted it, that that (_slut_) girl had just jumped on him and he hadn't had time to push her away. And he said it so earnestly that she almost started to believe him, too. But then she would remember how she felt when she saw them (_betrayal, disappointment, despair…_) and forget his calm rationale. In fact, it wasn't until she saw (_James_) Potter that she truly considered that he might be telling the truth. She watched him a lot now, trying to understand why he would do _that_, and she noticed some things. Like how he would help the first years with their spells, and how he would help Hagrid with keeping up the grounds, and even how he comforted Alice when she and Frank had an argument. _And it was totally platonic_. He was just so responsible, even _moral_, even when he clearly would rather just curl up in his dorm and cry, that maybe she should give him another chance…

(A/N: And we all know how that turned out. Well, I hope that you enjoyed this. As you can tell by the dates, I did have some trouble with actually finishing this, but I think it turned out okay in the end. Thanks for reading!)


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